Sure, the election’s not over yet, but we’ve all been through so much together already, so why not get a little nostalgic?
“Look upon my works, ye mighty, and despair.”
It’s hard to tell what Newfoundland and Labrador’s leaders are thinking these days. So here’s some speculative satire.
Thanks to the patriotic resistence in Alberta, we obtained a top-secret planning guide used by the Western Separatist movement. They’ve got big plans.
The reason Jason Kenney is in Ontario on the federal campaign trail is because he is here for a good time, not a long time.
We now present you a partial list of the many great initiatives that transformed rural Newfoundland and Labrador into the envy of the world.
I’m beginning to think the patient is better off living in his fantasy. After I hear about New Year’s 2018 on the St. John’s waterfront, I want to join him.
It is October 2007. An emergency all-party government unleashes a political revolution in NL. But a sudden General Strike threatens to derail the province.
All Townie MHAs receive rural reeducation as the Baymen seize power in Newfoundland & Labrador. Meanwhile, a meal of Chow Mein nearly destroys the province.
Case study: Patient has moved from a depression over the loss of rural life to an hallucinatory state in which rural Newfoundland and Labrador is flourishing.
[Rome, February 2013] “Yes, hello, hello, Terra Nova? Hello! Newfoundland and Labrador, it is Franco Astaldi, returning your call. Si, calling from Roma. Buongiorno! How can I help you? Our bid for the hydro dam is low? Hey, you crazy, you wanna a higher price? No, seriously we are having a sale this month on gianormous concrete dams. Si, this is true. Look I tell you, in confidence, Si, those other bidders, they don’t know the secret: we continue building when it snows by working under giant dome, is like magic igloo. Hey, and if there a problema down the line we make adjustments to the billing, no biggie. Do we know snow? Hey, I grow up in Torino! Labrador same thing, no? SNC-Lavalin, yeah, I know these guys, you crazy? Libya, Gaddafi, the whole deal. We were there building a highway, they were working with Muammar’s kid on the…